I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
