i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
