So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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