Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize