why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
