I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
