i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
he high fived his dick after we had sex
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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