I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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