shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
