So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize