There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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