yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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