I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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