actually, I'm a sock model
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he was CRYING into my vagina
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
the raccoons are back...
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