why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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