yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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