Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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