I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
