Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
