if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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