Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
