i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Sober January is a disaster.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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