Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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