Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS