We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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