operation have a gay friend backfired
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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