You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
