Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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