I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize