so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
