on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
