you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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