Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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