Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
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