is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize