Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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