Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
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