Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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