i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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