I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
