Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going