her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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