did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
