In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
