remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Apparently you make a good broom.
Is it because I queefed?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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