turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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