Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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