thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
