So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
