do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she peed on how many people?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
